Living with Superman

It's not easy to live with an addict. There are addicts in all walks of life. Not all of them are in the street. I was once with a heroin addict. I saw what the drugs did to him, what happened when he ran out. The sweating, sniveling, edginess, gastric problems. The shaking, screaming, vomiting. None of it pretty.

Having a drug legally prescribed does not mean you are not addicted. In fact, it's a great excuse. My ex is an addict. He has persuaded his family and his new wife that it's "between him and his doctor". This is an argument often used by those addicted to prescription drugs. However, they are still addicts. The reaction when they run out is the same. And they always run out.

I used to have sympathy when he ran out of his prescription drugs. I believed at one time that the opiates he took were for a legitimate problem, and that at some time in the future he would be able to do without. He took whatever he could find, precribed or on the street. His level of addiction to oxycontin was equivalent to 5 or 6 bags of heroin a day. The behavior was no different.

There were consequences. Often there were fights. When my ex bought street drugs, he cut deep into our money to live on, the capital for our business, the money we could have used to enjoy each other and grow closer. but none of that mattered if he didn't have what he wanted... and of course now needed.

Our budget, our business, our quality of life suffered. The drugs always came first. I started to lose sympathy. I wouldn't cover his butt when he missed jobs. I wouldn't say he wasn't home when he was getting high in the other room. I wouldn't lie for him.

He screamed at me. He stole from me. He turned to an old girlfriend who had more sympathy. Isn't that always the way? It was my fault for being such a bitch, and after all, he didn't have a problem because at least part of the drugs were legal.

One day he was so out of it, he left a letter from his girlfriend on my desk. Or maybe he did it on purpose to torment me. She wrote "dear Superman". Superman? She didn't know about the kryptonite. I'm sure she does now. Good luck with that.

It has been over two years since he walked out of our home for the last time, taking his drugs with him. I now have over two years clean.